It’s been said before that if it doesn’t kill you, then it makes you stronger.
Well, my assailant didn’t kill me – though he threatened to kill me, and my son too – and he did help me to finally break the cycles of victimization I was going through. To that end, yes indeed, he did make me stronger.
April 4th will mark the 14th year since that fateful day when I was attacked and brutalized by someone I thought I knew. In my own home. In the middle of the day. I still have moments – triggers and flashbacks – but with less frequency.
It was an ugly betrayal … and a horrible criminal act.
I am fortunate that I was able to find forgiveness for Jeffrey Kelavos. To a great degree, it has liberated my spirit, body and mind to where he no longer exists for me. It has allowed me to live without pain, anger, fear or resentment. It has allowed me to find my own voice and my own path in the journey of life and to do so with peace, joy, happiness and love. Forgiveness yes, never ever forgetting is different.
I’ve moved forward and dedicated my life to helping others who find themselves the unfortunate victims of violent crime. It has become my purpose and passion. This in turn has also helped me in ways unimagined. It doesn’t mean that I won’t have occasional flash backs; I will. Saran Wrap, the Rape Crisis Center (the safe place), running half naked through my complex. But for the most part, I push myself hard and try to live each and every day in a way that I not only survive, but thrive.
Each and every one of you is a unique individual who has been tested in a severe manner. You have unique experiences about trauma and survival, and about how precious life is.
Every one of you understands that life is a struggle; I’m asking you to fight for it.
Every one of you understands that life is a lesson; I’m asking you to learn it.
Every one of you understands that life is a challenge: I’m asking you to meet it.
And finally, every one of you understands that life is God’s gift; I’m asking you to cherish it; embrace it.
Please know you are never alone. We are family. And as a family, we can overcome any adversity that comes our way. Each and every one of you is a beautiful, radiant individual who was put here not just to survive but to shine and shine brightly.
You are never alone. The same divine spirit that guides the stars and the galaxies, also guides you. Tap into the creative energy that resides in us all and release the life force for your own good, the good of your family and for the good of others.
I’m keenly aware of the fact that this was not the race that you wanted to run. I know that. I know it deep in my bones. But I’m also keenly aware that all of you, will wake up today – and hopefully every day – and say, this is the race I’m in, and come what may, I’m going to complete it!
Please help Crime Survivors to be as great an organization as we can be … and to continue with community outreach or consider making a tax-deductible donation to support victims, survivors & families at www.crimesurvivors.org
You are never alone … God loves You and so do I.
With Faith, there is Hope… PW